


Only you can set my heart on fire

by Rosesnfeathers



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Actor Liam, Happy Ending, Louis works for Marvel too, M/M, Marvel Comics - Freeform, Mutual Pining, Niall is Liam agent, Stylist Harry, comic book artist zayn, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-22
Updated: 2015-05-24
Packaged: 2018-03-31 17:32:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 22,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3986725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rosesnfeathers/pseuds/Rosesnfeathers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“And even Liam Payne is on the list man! How funny it would be Payne, playing The Pain!”</p><p>Zayn quickly raises his head towards Louis and he feels his own face fall at those words. Knowing that Louis’ would see it, he tries to busy himself by looking at his phone and drinking coffee but, it’s too late. He sees his friend looking at that big poster on their wall, the cover of the first issue of The Pain, and then looking back at Zayn. He does that a few times before finally speaking.</p><p>“Oh you didn’t!”</p><p>“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”</p><p>Or</p><p>Zayn works for Marvel Comics and maybe has the biggest crush on actor Liam Payne. What a surprise it is to him when his comic, blatantly inspired by Liam himself, is going to be on the big screen and Liam is the one chosen to play the main character.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You're the only thing I wanna touch

**Author's Note:**

> HIIIIIIIIIII!!!
> 
> Finally i'm done with that story. Yay? After months and months of writing (I know the fic is pretty short but I lost motivation along the way a few times) I'm finally done. It's the first fic i'm writing straight in english, without writing it in french first and translating it, so sorry about it yeah? English isn't my native language and I did had a lot of help about it.
> 
> I do not own any of One Direction or any characters of Marvel Comic's. Any ressemblance with Jonathan Wate and any other comic books' character isn't wanted, I tried to create something with the little knowledge (and the huge love) of superheroes I had. I also know nothing of London or nothing about british vocabulary so, sorry!
> 
> Special thank you's toooo : Irma, Carlos, Claudie and Vanessa for reading a few parts of it and giving me motivation to keep writing, to help me with Jonathan's super powers of just for telling me : You better keep writing because I want to read that!  
> AND a suuuper massive thank you to Avery for reading it and fix my mistakes and give me some quick english grammar lessons and for all her kind words and her love)
> 
> *Title and inspiration by the song Love me like you do by Ellie Goulding*

Nothing.

His mind is completely blank, just like the pages of his sketchbook and Zayn is becoming more and more frustrated.

Finally, Marvel was giving him the opportunity to create his own character. Finally his wildest dream is coming true and… nothing. He couldn’t think of a single thing he wanted to draw, not even a tiny hint of a story. Stephen, his boss, had told him that he really loved his work. That everybody really appreciated what he was doing for them, that he was one of Marvel’s best artists at the moment. He also told him that he was going to get paired up with Tomlinson for the story, since the two of them work so well together.

He was given the opportunity to have his own comic book, written with his best friend. What could go wrong? Well obviously, the fact that he couldn’t even draw a single line and that he was just completely uninspired.

A week had passed since Stephen had talk to him about it and Zayn had spent the whole week in his old sweatpants, drinking coffee, smoking cigarettes and trying to take some showers in the process, even though he couldn’t leave his sketchbook too far away, scared he would miss the moment where the inspiration would hit him. But it hadn’t, and Zayn is losing patience.

He jumps suddenly, scared by his phone vibrating on his desk and he picks up instantly when he sees his older sister’s face on the screen.

“Hey Don!”

“Hi Zayn, what are you doing tonight?”

He takes a look at himself, at his old pajama pants and the wrinkled t-shirt, running fingers through his hair, feeling them dirty and greasy against his skin.

“Uh. nothing. Trying to do something about this comic, to be honest!”

“Come to a movie with me? You need to get out of your place, Z. There’s this new movie I want to see, you should see the lead actor. He is delicious, man!”

“Some stupid rom com again?”

“Yup!”

He knows that she is right, that staying inside is not going to help and that he needs some fresh air and some distraction so, with a sigh, he tells her he would love to before hanging up and jumping in the shower.

And it is good seeing her, spending some time with his big sister and listening to her talk about her job and her boyfriend. It is just really nice to think about something else than this non-existent superhero that he is supposed to create.

But, if you ask him what that movie was about, he’s not sure if he could give you an honest answer.

See, delicious was not strong enough to describe the actor Doniya had told him about. No, delicious was a little bit ridiculous. Handsome? No. Beautiful wasn’t fitting either. Zayn couldn’t think of a word strong enough to do justice to those big brown eyes and that broad set of shoulders. And his lips, oh god his lips. He couldn’t remember a single word that actor had said, but he could tell you how beautiful the curve of his mouth was when he smiled, straight into the camera.

So yeah, Zayn left the cinema without a single clue what the movie was about, but with a crush the size of the moon on a man called Liam Payne.

So when he gets back home, he spends literally hours on Google and YouTube and almost every other social media website he can find, trying to learn everything about the man and oh, what a bad idea it turns out to be.

He learns that Liam Payne is about a year younger than him, so he is 23. That he is a Virgo and has two older sisters. That the movie he just “saw” was his first leading role and that he had a few other smaller roles in a handful of movies over the last 5 years. He used to be bullied at school, and was very sick when he was just a little boy, having trouble with one of his kidneys. He never gave up on his dream of being an actor and every story Zayn reads about the man makes his heart beat faster in his chest and, ok man, calm down you’re supposed to be a grown up man, not a teenage fan girl.

He also learns, to his own delight, that Liam is openly bisexual because, he didn’t want to have to hide anything about his love life to his fans and that he is anything but ashamed about it. Wants to be a model to other young people who struggle with it. He said in one interview that “he is the way he is and if because of that, he could lose some important roles… Well, those roles just weren’t for him in the first place, too bad.”

He reads a few rumors too, about him dating his stylist, some really handsome man with curly long hair and bright green eyes named Harry and no, Zayn doesn’t feel a little pang of jealousy in his chest thinking about it, not at all.

“Brave,” Zayn thinks. The man is so brave and so confident with himself, he isn’t scared of showing his true self and Zayn is so screwed. Could Liam Payne be any more perfect? He didn’t think so but, he is wrong, so wrong. He is watching some interview he did a few weeks ago, for some promo stuff for that new movie he had just seen and to the question “Liam, what would be your dream role?” he had answered, almost shy about it (more like fucking adorable, yeah) “that he always wanted to play some superhero, that he was such a geek about comic book stuff.”

So almost violently, Zayn closes his laptop and grabs his sketchbook and his pencil and, with shaky hands, he starts to draw. He draws for hours, until his arm and his hand hurts because of it and until the sun rises into the London sky. His head is hurting and his eyes are dry and heavy with sleep but he has his character in front of him, dressed in a beautiful navy suit, with broad shoulders and biceps the size of Zayn’s head. If the squareness of his jaw or the roundness of his cheeks, or even the dark blond hair lingering on his chin reminds him of a certain someone well, nobody needs to know who his inspiration was.

After a quick change of clothes and a very strong coffee, Zayn drives to Louis’ without even checking the time. He is received by his best friend giving him a murderous look, looking like he literally just fell out of bed. It was indeed way too early for a Saturday morning, oops. But, when Zayn opens his sketchbook and shows him what he had spent the whole night drawing, he sees that little glint into Louis’ eyes, and they are both so ready for that comic book.

 

***

 

After too many coffees and too many pieces of paper thrown on the floor of Louis’ living room, they are finally starting to have something real to work with.

“Okay so, his power is that he is like, unbreakable, but how did he gain that strength? Is he some kind of experiment?”

“I was thinking he was born with it? Some kind of mutant?”

Zayn hates that word, always had. Mutant made it sound like it was wrong, but having those powers was nothing but wrong.

“So he is born with like, super bones? He can’t get hurt because his bones just don’t break and his skin could be like, thicker than usual so he almost never bleeds too. It’s good,” Louis says, scribbling some notes and nodding his head like it was just the best idea he ever had.

“Okay and you told me you want him brave?” he says, starting to walk in circles into his living room, is notebook still in his shaky hands and his hair is a complete mess.

“Fearless. I want him ready to fight for everyone, for justice and fairness in the world; I want him to be a good person, with a heart of gold,” Zayn tells him, with a huge grin on his face.

“Okay. Listen to me, I think I have something.”

And Louis sits in front of his computer then, writing everything that runs to his mind while saying it out loud to share it with Zayn.

_Jonathan Wate was raised by his mother and she was the only parental figure he knew for as far as he can remember. He didn’t have a father and his mother had never mentioned him._

“It could be where he gets his powers, from his unknown father, you know?”

_When he was 8, his mother found herself a boyfriend but Jonathan hated him with a passion. He didn’t respect his mother at all, always screaming at her and giving her orders, and one day, he came back from school to his stepfather beating his mother. His vision suddenly went red, completely blinded by his anger. He dropped his little backpack in a corner before going to the man and trying to pull him away from his mother, hitting him with his little fists, over and over. The man turned towards Jonathan and tried to slap him in the face, but he fell, holding his hand in pain like he just broke it on little Jonathan’s face. And the weirdest thing was that his face hadn’t hurt at all._

_“What did you do?” His mother asked him. “You’re not supposed to be that strong Jonathan. Promise me you will never hurt anyone ever again?”_

_And they ran away from that abusive step father, but he didn’t listen to her. He realized he was almost unbreakable and dangerously strong too. He didn’t know where his strength came from, but he knew it wasn’t natural, that he wasn’t “normal.”  His intentions were always the best though, always to help other kids in trouble, other kids being bullied. But when he was sixteen, Jonathan got into a fight with the wrong boy, son of one of the most powerful and dangerous gangsters in town. So on a rainy Friday night, when he came back home, he found his mother dead on the floor, some cruel vengeance someone was playing on him. From this day, he swear he would continue to help the innocents, and most of all, that he will avenge his mother, so at only 16 years old he decided he will embrace his powers and become…_

“We need a name Zayn! We need to give him something powerful because he is like, strong like The Hulk or like The Thing…”

Zayn looks at him, with big eyes, waiting for Louis’ to find something. He knows better than everyone that when he gets into one of those moods it’s better not to stop him.

“ _THE PAIN_!”

No. He must be kidding. They couldn’t name his character, who was blatantly inspired by Liam _Payne_ himself, _The Pain_? Someone will make the connection. They would get into trouble and they will get sued for it and,

“You hate it,” Louis says. “It’s written all over your face, man”

“No, no I don’t hate it lets… Let’s just keep it on hold for now? We have so much more stuff to think about, Louis!”

And after getting almost the whole story written, with the tragic back story, the villain and of course, the girl, (Zayn wanted her with long dark hair and tattoos and tried to ignore Louis’ strange look at his request), it was dark outside and Zayn was ready to sleep for the whole week. He ends up sleeping for almost 18 hours and on the next Monday Louis and him meet with the big boss to show him their work, more excited and proud than ever.

Stephen loved it, they all loved it and they are almost as excited as Louis and Zayn were. They wanted them to start working on it as soon as possible and, to Zayn disappointment, everybody is on board with the name _The Pain_ , so he just closes his eyes and wishes really, really hard that nobody will ever make the connection between his character and the beautiful, stunning, amazing new actor. So they start working like mad men, but it was totally worth it, because Zayn was finally living one of his biggest dreams.

 

***

 

**3 years later**

 

Zayn and Louis had gotten drunk maybe three nights in a row when they had learned that their comic was going to be made as a movie. A movie! Zayn couldn’t believe he had gotten the chance to have his own comic book, and now it was so successful that it’s going to be on the big screen. They were having loads of updates about it, about the producers, about where they would be going to film the final battle scene, and every time Zayn received an e-mail about it, he did a little dance around his office. He couldn’t believe it was his life now. Wow!

Today, he is on his way to the nearest Starbucks to grab something for Louis and him and his phone beeped in his pocket with a new e-mail notification. He almost dropped it on the concrete and his heart most definitely stopped as he read the list of actors they had called to audition for the leading role of Jonathan Wate.

Zayn didn’t even read the 5 names, the first one is enough for his blood to turn cold in his veins, because of course, _Liam Payne_ is on that list.

He orders his two coffees and then walks back to the office, his mind running and his heart racing in his chest. He is greeted by Louis’ smiling face, who had obviously read the e-mail and was more than thrilled with all those successful actors they wanted to audition for the first role. Zayn answers him with little grunts and short words; unable to think about anything else than the fact that he was going to officially meet Liam Payne.

Because, see, that crush is way more than a onetime thing. It is way more than a “oh I think you’re cute I’m gonna draw a comic book inspired by you.” No. Zayn kept going to the cinemas to see every movie he was in, buying magazines about him, and even more than once in a while going into the Liam Payne tag on Tumblr, to feed his thirst and need of new pictures of him. So yeah, that crush, he had pretty much lost every bit of control he had over it.

It keeps getting bigger and bigger because, Liam is just getting better and hotter and Zayn couldn’t help himself really. And now, he is on the list, to play the character he had created because of him and he didn’t know if it was better to cry or just laugh about it.

“And even Liam Payne is on the list man! How funny it would be Payne, playing _The Pain_!”

Zayn quickly raises his head towards Louis and he feels his own face fall at those words. Knowing that Louis’ would see it, he tries to busy himself by looking at his phone and drinking coffee but, it’s too late. He sees his friend looking at that big poster on their wall, the cover of the first issue of The Pain, and then looking back at Zayn. He does that a few times before finally speaking.

“Oh you didn’t!”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Oh yes you do. Don’t think I haven’t see you spending hours on Tumblr looking at pictures of him or how excited you get every time he has a new movie coming out. I knew you had a crush on him man, but… YOU LITERALLY DREW THE PAIN INSPIRED BY HIM! I can’t believe I haven’t seen all of this earlier.”

“Louis, please!”

But Louis just smiles at him, fully smiling, a Cheshire cat kind of smile, like he thinks it’s cute, no, adorable. Zayn didn’t do adorable, he is a bad ass comic book artist, with tattoos and he is smoking cigarettes and…  His comic was going to be a _movie_ for fuck sake! He didn’t have time to have a crush on actors like Liam Payne but the fact was that, yeah, he does, and he is so screwed because Friday after noon, he is going to finally meet him and it’s going to be the most embarrassing day of his life, really.

 

***

 

It is the most stressful day of his entire life. He slept maybe two hours last night because he couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that today, he is going to meet Liam fucking Payne, the man he had been dreaming about for almost three years now. He never thought he was ever going to meet him in real life and suddenly, as he looks for something decent to wear, all of his wanking sessions featuring thoughts of the man were coming back into his mind. _Fuck_.

He finally picks some jeans, the pale blue ones with the rip on his left knee that he matches with a big comfy dark red sweater. The sleeves are a bit too long but he likes it too much to care, and Louis always said he looked good in it, that he always want to snuggle with him every time he wears it. He didn’t dress to impress today no, Liam Payne is some successful actor and he is just some geek who decided to draw superheroes for a living. Like he even could catch the other man eye anyway, you wish, Malik.

He pulls his long hair back into a sleek looking ponytail and finally puts his black framed glasses on his nose. He tries to steady his breathing and most of all, his heart beat, saying to himself that, he was only going to look at Liam’s audition, they probably won’t even talk to each other. It was nothing really, he could totally deal with this.

His phone starts vibrating on his desk and he picks it up before reading a text from Louis,

_READY TO MEET THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE?!? :)))))_

He is so not ready for this.

 

***

 

He walks into a big white room, with no furniture but a long table in the corner and a few chairs around it. Louis is already there talking with some people. Zayn recognizes the producer and the casting director among them and Louis motions to him to step closer and to take a seat. They tell them that there are five actors auditioning today and that they want to be here to choose with them because Jonathan is their character, which means they would know better than everyone who would be best to play it.

They did mention that Liam Payne was going to be last because it was honestly their first choice, and they thought he would be the best for the role so they want him to audition at the end of the day, not wanting to be distracted by his performance.

Is Zayn going to survive that day? Mmm yeah, probably not.

So Zayn had pretty much no idea at all what happened with the four first actors to audition before them. His mind went completely blank, trying to prepare himself to have Liam in front of him. Louis hated the first one and he said it as soon as he left the room like, physically it was wrong you couldn’t believe looking at him that he was supposed to be one of the strongest man on earth. The rest was just white noise, coffee and food and just _stress_. That’s until he hears someone say, “Here we go, let’s see what Liam can do now.”

Zayn hears the door open, footsteps coming closer and closer and he knows he needs to lift his head but he can’t. His eyes are stuck on the surface of the table, his hands holding his pen so hard he thinks it might break in his fingers.

“Fuck…”

The word is spoken softly, just a breath but the swear is noticeable in the quiet room and it’s Liam who says it and it makes Zayn lift his head to finally look at the man in front of him.

“Uh, Liam? Are you okay?”  says one of the producers, laughter in his voice.

And Zayn’s eyes instantly meet Liam’s because the other man is already looking at him, and they are so wide and his mouth is open like he is in shock. Why is Liam looking so surprised when Zayn is the one with a crush? What the hell is happening?

He watches as Liam closes his mouth, shaking himself a little. His eyes leave Zayn’s for a tiny moment to look at Louis before looking at Zayn again. He seems to finally remember that one of the producers had just asked him a question because he looks over to him and begins to talk.

“Uh. Sorry Martin it’s … It’s just that. Niall didn’t tell me that Mr. Malik and Mr. Tomlinson were going to be here and… Oh wow. It’s just. I’m sorry, it’s so embarrassing but, I’m such a fan of your work and yeah, playing Jonathan it’s just… One of my dreams, I guess? And you being here, it’s a bit intimidating, to be honest because you created that character? And yeah ok, I’m going to shut up now. I have an audition to do. Sorry. I promise that I don’t talk so much all the time and that I can actually play, okay?”

For the last three years, Zayn has had a huge crush on the man standing in front of him, dressed in dark blue jeans and a light denim shirt over a white t-shirt. Zayn sees his chest hair and the tattoos on his forearms and the stubble on his cheeks and his wide brown eyes are even softer and warmer in real life. And if what he was feeling towards Liam was a crush before, he is pretty sure that right now, he just fell in love.

It wasn’t some power trip, knowing that Liam was a fan of his work. No, it was just seeing him so human, so vulnerable and so ready and not ashamed to tell them that he loves their work. Zayn did the first thing to cross his mind then,

“Huge fan of your work myself, Liam.”

He watches the cheeks of the man before him changing into a lovely pink color and his eyes suddenly shinning really bright,

“Oh wow. This is so not helping me be less nervous, but thank you.”

And Liam turns to Martin, again, answering the man’s questions as Zayn feels a hand resting on his thigh.  He looks at Louis to catch him smiling at him like he just knew, like he just witnessed Zayn’s heart beating out of his chest like in those silly cartoons he watched as a child. Liam moves to the spot on the floor where he needed to stand, and he starts saying his lines.

And the world just stops for a while because Liam is Jonathan. Well to be honest, Jonathan is Liam and it was Zayn who created it that way but, it is just perfect really, it is brilliant. It’s like a switch had been turned and it’s not Liam standing in front of them anymore no, it’s _The Pain_. If Zayn squints his eyes just a little bit, he can almost see him in the navy blue suit. Even Louis next to him is completely speechless with his blue eyes wide with surprise.

When Liam goes silent, done with his audition, the only sound in the room is his breathing, going fast with the intensity of the part he just performed before them. His eyes find Zayn’s instantly like he wants his approval more than anything else. He gives them a little bow and a soft thank you before leaving the room, taking Zayn’s heart with him along the way.

“Well boys, I think we have our Jonathan.”

The biggest surprise of the day is Louis staying completely silent, just nodding with his eyes still wide and his smile even wider like Christmas had come early and Liam was the best present he could have ever received. Zayn manages a little, “Yeah he was perfect.” And that was it, they had their leading role, Jonathan is coming to life with the help of the amazing Liam Payne and…

Zayn decides it is the last time he is playing with fate and that having this stupid crush on cute actors and deciding to draw them in superhero suits was maybe the worst idea he ever had. Or the best, maybe, since it had helped him to finally meet Liam? Be careful for what you wish for they say, because you might just get it.

 

***

 

It’s been a little more than a month since Liam’s audition and Zayn is sitting alone in his office, doing some last minute details on some pieces that need to be printed, with some music playing softly in the background. Louis is out for a meeting all afternoon and it’s good having the office only for him for once. It’s nice to work in calm and almost silence (aka without Louis’ constant chatter).

He hears the intercom suddenly come to life and he lower the sound of his music to hear Perrie’s lovely voice coming out of the speaker, “Hey Z. Got a visitor, can I send him to your office?”

“Sure thing. Who is he?”

“Oh! You’ll see,” says Perrie, with a teasing tone that makes Zayn’s heart race.

His office is full of papers and empty food containers and if it’s one of their big bosses, he is really not ready to great them properly right now. He tries to rapidly clean his desk a little, throwing paper cups and old food containers in the bin when he hears someone softly knock against his door.

He opens it, with a black sharpie stuck behind his ear and his hair looking like a right mess, he opens that damn door to finally meet a pair of awfully familiar brown eyes and a smile, he thinks, he will never be fully ready to see directed at him and only him.

Because Liam is here, in his office, and he is smiling at him so bright, like seeing Zayn is the best part of his day so far.

“Liam,” Zayn manages to say without his voice shaking, or cracking or him just melting into a puddle of ink and tobacco and coffee on his office floor. “Uh, I mean, Mr. Payne. How can I… ( _drop down on my knees and just give you the best blowjob of your life_ ) Help you?”

“Oh please. Don’t call me Mr. Payne. I’m Liam. Just Liam.”

“And I’m Zayn.”

“Yeah, I’m aware,” Liam giggles.

Did he… Did he just make Liam Payne blush and do that adorable thing when he just giggles with an adorable shrug of his broad and strong shoulders?

“No uh… I mean, you can call me just Zayn. Not Mr. Malik or anything, okay?”

“Just Zayn,” says Liam, with such tenderness, like it’s his new favorite word and… Can he just stop smiling for two seconds so Zayn can get his brain to start working properly?

“I’m sorry to arrive like this, without even calling first but, I was wondering if maybe you can talk to me a bit more about the character, you know? What inspired you for him or stuff like that. To help me play him a bit better.”

Oh how Zayn is glad for Louis’ absence right now. He could just hear his voice in his head, “ _Oh Liam. It’s actually a really interesting story…_ ”

“Sure, sure. Come in, grab a seat, mate.”

Liam is looking at all the posters on the walls. Movie posters of just covers of a few comic books he has worked on. He smiles at Zayn’s laptop, proudly decorated with the emblem of _Stark Industries_ and finally sits in a chair next to Zayn, looking at him expectantly, waiting for him to talk, to tell him everything.

But Zayn can’t right? He can’t tell him straight away about his uncontrollable crush? About how his hands are sweating right now, how his heart is beating so fast in his chest it’s almost scary, and its just from the proximity of Liam. He can’t scare him like that on the first day, can he?

It’s hard though, lying to that cute and adorable face, lying to those eyes, so earnest, so curious to learn. Zayn makes the decision in a heartbeat, that he wants to tell him the truth (not the whole truth, like not the late night tumblr stalking kind of truth but…)

“This is really embarrassing,” he says with a loud sigh. “I’m not even sure you really want to know.”

“Of course I want to know, Zayn

 _Oh fuck it_. “My inspiration was uh… you Liam?”

“Excuse me?”

At least he is smiling a little bit, a confused kind of smile but, he is smiling. At least his eyes are still shinning with amusement and he is not flying out of his seat, ready to leave Zayn’s office. Or worse, his whole life. He is not looking at Zayn like he is some kind of freak either so, he continues,

“I saw that movie with my sis, uh… your first big one?” (Like he will admit he watched it maybe twelve times since that day… and that he knows pretty well what the title is) “And when I came home I just started to draw and… _TADA_!” he says it, gesturing to the first issue of _The Pain_ proudly hanging on the wall. Jonathan Wate, no, Liam, on the cover with his navy blue suit and his mask only covering his eyes and the big "P" on his chest.

Zayn just can’t look away from Liam because his face is nothing but pure happiness. It’s like his face just can’t contain the size of his huge smile and his eyes well, they are just gone. Hidden completely by his lovely round cheeks, pushed up by the force of his smile. It’s one of the most beautiful sights Zayn has ever seen, and knowing he is the reason to that makes his stomach flutter almost painfully and he smiles back, because he just learned that Liam’s happiness is one of the best and most contagious things ever.

“Really? But I’m not a superhero Zayn!”

“No, but you’re quite fit, man.”

He quickly put his hand in front his mouth, wanting those words to go back there as soon as possible and shove them down his throat so he could stop his brain, or his heart really, for blurting such things. Too soon, Zayn. Real smooth. Are you going to ask for his hand next?

He watches as Liam’s smile falls from his face, only to be replaced by an intense blush, going all the way down his chest and he bites at his bottom lip, the plump and indecent one, before clearing his throat and looking back up at Zayn, his expression now dangerously serious. “Thanks. I guess? Um… same to you. But I would say beautiful more than just fit.”

_Beautiful._

Okay, calm down Zayn, take a breath. _Don’t faint_. You’re going to be fine. But he can’t focus on anything, anything but Liam’s voice saying beautiful over and over again. You’ve been call beautiful before and you didn’t have a stroke about it, just breathe, man. They are just sitting next to each other in complete silence for way too long, both with a heavy blush on their cheeks.

It’s like Liam was waiting for Zayn to flirt back, to just give him a confirmation that there was, indeed some flirting but… It’s like Zayn had forgot all of the words of the English dictionary suddenly. He was still thinking about a good answer, about a good way to say something clever, but Liam just cleared his throat, again, avoiding Zayn’s eyes.

“Anyway, let’s talk about Jonathan right? S’why I’m here.”

The smile is back on his face, but it’s not the real one. And Zayn hates himself a little for already knowing what Liam’s real smile looks like. It’s like he had put his acting facade for Zayn, like he was afraid he just scared him to death, like he just have been too honest.

But Zayn wants to be called beautiful again. He wants to hear Liam’s voice whispering it against the skin of his neck in the darkness of his bedroom. But it’s too late, the moment is gone and it’s his fault. Because he can’t act normally with the other boy’s eyes on him.

He tries to do something to bring back the real smile on Liam’s face, by putting one of his hands on top of Liam’s and squeezing gently, his smile a little bit crooked and a softness in his eyes, a softness he knows that is here just for him, because of him,

“What about a little tour of the office? Wanna see my _Iron Man_ ’s suit?”

 

***

 

Liam Payne is twelve years old.

Like, he is smiling so big and he is almost running around the office and he is just so happy to meet everyone. He looks like a mix between a puppy and Zayn’s hottest wet dream and it shouldn’t be hot or adorable but it’s all of those things and Zayn wants to bang his head against a wall.

When Zayn finally showed him the _Iron Man_ suit, he was silent for a whole minute, scared of touching it like he had found the Holy Grail. It was one of the cutest moments Zayn has ever witnessed so far.

It’s so easy to let yourself fall into that huge ball of sunshine that is Liam Payne. And it’s so painful feeling your crush just growing bigger and bigger into your chest every time he looks at you or just smiles like what you just said was the funniest thing ever. It’s so easy to let yourself just feel the warmth radiating for him, not just from his body but from his heart too.

He asks everybody about their jobs, and is genuinely interested by the answers he receives, nodding his head and smiling and he is fascinated and it’s fascinating to watch him. He shakes everybody’s hands and tries to learn their names and compliment their work and…

Zayn just looks at him like he can’t be real, like he is too much. It’s a thing to fall in love with a character on the movie screen, to stalk the actor on the Internet because you think he is one of the fittest blokes you have ever laid your eyes on. It’s okay to read stuff about him and tell yourself oh wow, he is a good person. But Zayn wasn’t ready to witness it. Zayn wasn’t ready to feel how good it is to be next to Liam Payne, and how he had waited all his life to have the privilege to know someone as bright as him.

“Well, well. Isn’t that Mr. Liam Payne,” Louis’ says, voice suddenly too loud and bursting the little bubble of a daydream Zayn had fallen into. “What a nice surprise, seeing you at Marvel Comics today.”

He walks towards Liam with confidence and shakes his hand firmly, sparing a glance and a wink in Zayn’s direction and oh, this can’t be good.

“Louis Tomlinson. Nice seeing you again,” says Liam with a huge smile on his face.

“What are you doing here today? Zayn is giving you a little tour of the office?”

“Yeah. I came to ask Zayn about the character you know, to play him a bit better, I guess.”

He says it looking at Zayn with a small smile on his lips, like he just remembers what Zayn had told him earlier. About him being the inspiration for the character. And he looks like he is almost proud of it, maybe? Zayn wants him to be proud, he wants him to be happy all the time. A little part of himself wishes he could be the only one to make him happy but… It’s maybe asking for too much right now.

“Oh and I wasn’t good enough? I wrote that comic too Payne, you know.”

Zayn knows the teasing tone in Louis’ voice is just for fun, but the blush on Liam’s face is telling him otherwise. The look on his face is the one of someone genuinely scared that he had just insulted Louis without meaning too. He needs to jump into the conversation because he knows Louis and he knows that he could easily say stuff just to embarrass him in front of Liam. And Liam isn’t used yet to the exuberant human being that is Louis Tomlinson.

He put a comforting hand on Liam’s shoulder then, trying to think about everything but the broadness of it, about the muscles hiding underneath the fabric of his shirt.

“Don’t listen to Louis, he loves talking shit. You had a meeting, remember Louis?”

“I did Zaynie, I did. Anyway we both know you’re the best to talk about The Pain right, babe?”

Zayn sees, from the corner of his eyes Liam glancing between Louis and him with a questioning look on his face while he tries himself to tell Louis’ to just shut the fuck up without using words.

“Um. Are you two… Uh, together?”

 _WHAT?_ Louis eyes goes as wide as saucers before he starts laughing hysterically and Zayn’s drops his hand from Liam’s shoulder before shooting him a very confused look, fighting a crazy fit of laughter himself.

“Me and Tommo? Together?”

“Well, I don’t know. You seem pretty close and he just called you babe and… I’m totally fine with that, really, I was just curious.”

Liam is rambling now, his cheeks red with embarrassment and he is now avoiding both of their eyes with his hands buried deep into his pockets. Louis takes a step forward then and put his hands on Liam shoulders before tilting his head just a little bit to look him in the eyes and speaks to him really seriously. 

“No. We are best friends. Have been for years now. I have a girlfriend and Zayn is incredibly, desperately single. Okay?”

Zayn thinks Louis sends Liam a wink before taking a step back, and he swears his heart just stopped in his chest.

But then Liam sends him a shy look with an adorable smile on his lips, rubbing absently at the hair on the back of his neck and… Zayn is still debating if he either loves or hates Louis right now. Because Liam doesn’t look against Zayn’s being “incredibly, desperately single.” If Zayn wasn’t trying to read too much into Liam every move, he would say he even looks pleased with it.

“Anyway, sorry to spoil your fun boys but, Stephen needs us Zayn. So I’m afraid it’s the end of that lovely little tour you were giving Liam.”

“Oh! Of course. I’ve taken already enough of your time Zayn. I’m sorry.”

He can’t let him leave like that. Zayn needs to do something, anything, just to show Liam he had a great time today. That sharing those few moments with him was amazing and that his presence was more than wanted today. So as Liam is waving goodbye to Louis, thanking him and telling him how excited he is to start filming, Zayn grabs him by the wrist and pulls him a bit closer.

He don’t really want Louis’ to listen but, he knows he is going to anyway, “Today was great, Liam. You didn’t waste any of my time, don’t worry.” He tightens his grip a little against Liam skin, not ready to let him go yet and oh so scared of the next question he wants to ask him.

“Do you think we could um… Trade numbers, maybe? In case you have more questions about the comic, you know?”

And he hears Louis’ quiet chuckles in the background but he doesn’t care. Not when Liam is looking at him with bright eyes and pink cheeks and his lips parted in surprise and he kind of wants to kiss that surprise away.

“Of course!”

Zayn let go of his wrist then to pick his phone into his pocket and gives it to Liam, who picks it up with shaking fingers and quickly enters his number in it. Zayn sends him a short text to give him his own number and he smile when he hears a soft ringtone coming from Liam’s back pocket.

“See ya, Liam,” he says, walking backwards for a few steps before turning around to join Louis who was waiting for him.

And for the rest of the day he tries really hard not to giggle like a school girl knowing that he has Liam’s number. That he spent hours with him and that he made him laugh, and smile and even blush. He tries not to hide his face and just scream in his hands because he also remembers one incredibly important thing : Liam had called him beautiful.

 

***

 

_**@Real_Liam_Payne followed you.**_

_**@Real_Liam_Payne Siiiick day at Marvel’s yesterday. Thanks to @ZaynMalik, mad man ah! ;)** _

Zayn is staring at his phone in shock. He is sitting at his kitchen table, in just his boxers and a bright red hoodie with the hammer of Thor printed on the front. He is clutching so hard at his coffee cup he’s sure he is about to hear the porcelain crack in his hands.

He opens his twitter app so quickly he almost drops his phone on the floor because he can’t remember what his profile picture is, he might be looking ridiculous in it and _HOW THE FUCK DID LIAM MANAGED TO FIND HIS TWITTER_?

And then he remembers the most important fact of it all. He has Liam’s _PHONE NUMBER_ in his phone. He could text him, say thank you, flirt with him but he just can’t move.

He drinks his coffee with shaky hands, trying to keep his mind occupied, but the number of is twitter followers is constantly growing and his phone keeps on buzzing with notifications of people wanting to know more about the movie.

He finishes his coffee, goes out for a quick cigarette outside and then goes into the shower. He tries really, really hard not to think about Liam. About his broad shoulders, and big hands. His hands so warm and just the perfect mixture between rough and smooth when they quickly shook hands yesterday. He tries not to think about those hands on him, on his waist, on his neck, ghosting against his ribs, closing around his cock… He tries not to think about those lips, so full and pink, about the way they say his name, about how good they would feel all over him.

He tries really hard not to think about all those things, but _he_ ends up being really hard anyway. The water of his shower suddenly feels too hot and the steam around him is almost suffocating because it’s too much. It was a thing to dream about those things from afar, but he can see them clearly now, vividly.

He pushes his damp hair away from his face before closing one hand around his hard cock already leaking at the tip just from thinking about Liam’s mouth and the softness of his palms. And then, the daydream is changing and Liam is naked, in the shower with him, on his knees and that mouth is stretched around him and Zayn can feel his knees almost give up with that pure lust suddenly pumping through his veins.

He should be ashamed really, because he’s going to see Liam again and he’s going to think about the way he wanked in the shower thinking about him. But he can’t find any strength in him to feel ashamed no, not when he is feeling so fucking good and hot all over. Not when Liam turns him on so much it hurts in the best way.

With a few last strokes and a quick flick of his wrist around the head, he is coming with a shout, all over his shower wall, biting at the flesh on his forearm to keep himself grounded. After staying a few moments under the water, trying to calm his breathing and the rhythm of his heart, Zayn quickly dries himself with a towel and walks to his room to dress. He doesn’t bother doing anything with his hair but ties it in a knot at the top of his head since it’s a day off and he is staying home anyway.

He walks to his office after a quick trip to the kitchen to make himself another coffee and goes through his e-mails because even if it’s a day off, work never really stops and he sometimes gets important stuff anyway.

He tries to stop thinking about Liam and the tweet and the fact that he could text him if he really wanted to (he’s fucking dying to). That he should probably tweet him that it was fine really,  pleasure to meet him and spend the day with him… Then his phone rings with a text message and Zayn jumps so high he almost fell off his chair and his heart almost get out of his chest.

_Tommo:  
You could’ve answer his tweet u know…_

_Tommo:_  
_Aren’t you suppose to have a school girl crush on the man or… ?_

He can’t lie to Louis because he always knows when he lies. Even if he answers him something like I’m fine bro, peachy, you know, I’m trying to make him wait a little, make him work for it… Louis would just laugh at him and throws something at his head. Good thing he is only texting him right now but still, he can’t lie, there is no need to at this point anyway.

 _Zayn:_  
_Coz i’m freaking out and I don’t know what to say to him!!!!!!_

 _Tommo:_  
_Man… I saw you flirt with people, you’re a pro. You also have that stupid pretty face of yours. You can do this, for fuck’s sake!_

 _Zayn:_  
_NOT WHEN IT’S LIAM FUCKING PAYNE!!!!_

 _Tommo:_  
_TEXT HIM OR I’M GOING TO TELL HIM HOW MUCH YOU CRIED IN THAT MOVIE WHERE HE DIES AND YOU SPENT THE WHOLE WEEK LOOKING AT PICTURES OF HIM TO CONVICE YOURSELF HE WAS STILL ALIVE!_

 _Zayn:_  
_I hate you SO much rn!!_

He put his phone screen first on his desk and look straight at his laptop screen, taking a few deep breathes to calm himself. God, he hates Louis Tomlinson. He remembers that movie. A bit too well. Also remembers how Louis made fun of him and told it was the best blackmail material ever. Seems it was true because he just used that moment against him.

He decides to at least answer Liam’s tweet first. So he opens the twitter app on his phone and thinks of something clever to write. Something not too much even though all he wants to do is tweet something like: You’re welcome. I wanna know what your birthmark tastes like.

_**@ZaynMalik Anytime Liam. The pleasure was all mine ;)** _

Oh my god. Was it too flirty? The winky face was too much right? Is it too late to just delete the tweet and type another one? No… Zayn wanted to be flirty. Flirty is good. Liam called him beautiful he can flirt with him… _Right_? Oh god he hates having a crush, why does everything feels so complicated? Why can’t he just have fell in love with someone normal? No he had to go with the international movie star?

 _Tommo:_  
_The pleasure was all mine HAHAHAHAHA. I bet you want to give him some pleasure right?_

 _Zayn:_  
_WTF MAN? You waited for me to answer him or what???????_

 _Tommo:_  
_Maybe? ;)_

He grabs his phone again, and his cup of coffee before moving towards his living room and sitting on his couch. He opens the T.V but ends up just staring at it, his coffee getting cold in his hands as his mind keeps lingering to Liam. It’s like he just can’t do anything this morning. Since the tweet, it’s the only thing on his mind. It’s getting annoying how he just can’t seem to stop thinking about the other man, and it’s worse since they actually met and touched and…

His phone is ringing.

There’s no picture on his screen just a name and it’s enough to get is heartbeat going faster than ever.

_**Liam Payne is calling…** _

Liam fucking Payne is fucking _calling_ him!!!!

“Hello?” Hopefully, his voice is steady and he sounds almost calm. You can do this, Malik.

“Zayn! How’s it going? It’s um… It’s Liam? Liam Payne?”

“How can I forget you, Liam? Also, I did save your number in my phone yesterday you know?”

“Oh right, of course,” even through the phone Zayn knows he is blushing. “I was calling to ask if, maybe, you would like to grab a coffee? Today? With me?”

What? Zayn is still sleeping. It’s all a dream, the tweets, the phone call, _THE COFFEE DATE_? Because it’s a date right? Maybe? Whatever, a boy can dream. But he is completely silent and doesn’t answer Liam’s question because his mind is just running and his palms are sweating and –

“… Just. You know because, yesterday we didn’t have time to talk about the character that much and… You’re kind of nice I guess? I liked yesterday, it was cool but, you can totally say no –”

“ I would love to Liam. Really. Sorry you just.. Uh… You caught me a little by surprise but I would love to meet you for a coffee.”

“Great!” and if the blush was noticeable through the phone, his smile is too. A wave of warmth and joy and a tiny little bit of something like love spreads through Zayn’s veins knowing that he is maybe the reason for that smile, even if he can’t see it. Yet.

“Would you mind coming to mine? It’s a bit hard getting out and having some privacy lately. I’ll tell Paddy to let you in – “

“Paddy?”

Jealousy again. Calm down Zayn he’s not even yours. (Yet, says that little voice in his head again)

“My bodyguard. I’ll text you the address. Or do you want me to send a car for you?” A car. Right. He is a movie star. It’s easy to forget when he is so… So Liam? 

“No, no. I’m fine. I have my own car. See you soon?” 

“Can’t wait!”

And he hangs up, just like that, saying he can’t wait to see Zayn and the hold Liam’s has on his heart just suddenly seems  to grow steadily stronger. It’s like it’s too late to stop falling, like what’s waiting for him at the end is Liam’s arms, ready to catch him.

(Or drop him but, Zayn think the risk is worth taking)

 

***

 

Zayn is now standing at the bottom of one of the highest and most expensive apartment buildings of all London and his hands are sweating and he is so nervous he could throw up right there on the sidewalk. At the reception desk, there is a pretty lady with bright red hair and next to her stands a tall brown haired man who looks kind of intimidating. That’s until he smiles to Zayn saying, “Mr. Malik!” and grabs his hand in a firm hand shake.

“M’name’s Patrick. But everybody calls me Paddy. Liam is pretty excited to see you Mr. Malik.”

“Please, call me Zayn,” and then he starts to blush because of Paddy’s words. But the bodyguard only seems even more pleased by it. Zayn’s pretty sure he blushed more in the last two days than he did in the past 27 years of his life.

“Oh don’t look so surprise. Liam’s a big fan of you.”

The elevator ride to reach the top floor is silent and he follows Paddy to Liam’s door without a word. Is he nervous because of what Paddy’s told him? Yeah. Liam is a fan of his work just like Zayn is a fan of Liam’s but… What if where Zayn can’t believe that Liam is even more beautiful and great and adorable and good that he could have dreamed of… What if on the other side Liam ends up being disappointed by Zayn?

Zayn isn’t mysterious like a lot of people think he is, he is just shy and sometimes people think he is rude or a snob because of it. And he doesn’t want Liam to think those things, he doesn’t want to disappoint him. Being a movie star is so much cooler than just drawing supeheroes for a living.

Oh God. Liam’s flat is huge. Zayn is pretty sure it takes a whole level of the building. A whole wall is made of glass and there are movies and comic books posters all over his living room. The kitchen is all marble and stainless steel and looks clean like Liam doesn’t use it that often.

There is a small dog running towards them as Paddy opens the door, and he pats his little head, scratching his ears before walking down a corridor and he yells at Liam that he is back with Zayn. There are four doors down that corridor and Liam’s head pops from one of them, the one Paddy just entered, with a bright smile on his face.  Zayn is still in the hall, clutching at his bag and trying to smile back without looking as nervous as he feels.

Liam walks towards him in grey sweatpants and just a white t-shirt with a black Adidas logo across his chest. He looks soft and comfortable and warm and Zayn just want them to lie on that big couch in the corner of Liam’s living room, he wants them to cuddle and remain like that all day. He wants to know if Liam is as soft and warm as he looks and he wants to know what Liam smells like and how good it must feel to be hold in his arms.

Liam is checking Zayn up and down, from his leather jacket, to his white t-shirt showing the ink on his collarbones, down to his legs clad in tight, dark skinny jeans and his black combat boots and his cheeks turns red. Again. He keeps blushing and Zayn think he won’t ever get tired of watching it. Of being the reason for that crimson shade spreading on his lovely face.

“Sorry. You’re all dressed up and I’m just –”

Zayn laughs. He saw pictures of Liam in suits probably more expensive than his own car and still, that outfit must be his favorite so far. Liam Payne the movie star is something special but, Zayn is quickly learning that just Liam is even better. That the _real_ Liam is what he wants.

“Don’t be silly Liam. It’s your home you can dress the way you want. And I like it, you look… Cuddly.”

He is the one blushing at those words (the amount of blushing between the two of them is getting ridiculous to be honest) but Liam’s dog is at his feet now, looking at him with his tail moving fast and his tongue out of his mouth, saving him from embarrassing himself even more in front of Liam. He looks so cute that Zayn removes his bag from his shoulder and crouches next to the little pup to scratch his ears, just like Paddy did earlier. It’s not long before he is on his back, showing his belly to Zayn.

“I think Loki likes you.”

“Loki?” That boy is such a geek, _God_. Zayn is in love. It’s not even funny anymore, because he thinks he is, he thinks there’s no way to back up now. He is already way too gone for that boy, “I hope he is nicer to you than Loki is with Thor.”

“Loki showed he was loyal to Thor, even if he had pretty weird way of showing it, Zayn. And yeah, he’s the sweetest really. Well, when he is not chewing my shoes.”

Zayn laughs at that and when he stands up to face Liam again, the other man has a pleased look on his face, like he is proud of making Zayn laugh. They stand in front of each other for a few beats too long, not talking, just looking and smiling and when Liam’s bites his bottom lip softly, Zayn suddenly needs to do something because he is about to jump him and climb him like a tree.

“I was promised a coffee, Mr. Payne.”

They end up on that big sofa, but sadly there isn’t any cuddling involved. They do sit really close though and Zayn gets dizzy with how good Liam’s smells, even better than he thought he would, and how warm he is by his side. They talk a lot, about everything and they laughs and it’s perfect. Liam is relaxed and funny and he keeps trying to make Zayn laugh looking so smug about it every time.

Liam talks about his sisters, and how he was at school, and how he deals with fame and that he keeps seeing his friends from back home to keep him grounded and he talks about his mom, who always cries no matter what he does. But he talks about her with a soft loving smile and Zayn feels it deep down in his stomach. She just keeps getting overwhelming by him being famous and she’s so proud. Watching Liam talking about the love he has for his family is the most beautiful thing, really.

Zayn talks too, about how much he loves to draw and how he always did, how much he loves his sisters and how Louis and him are the best of friends even if he can be a real pain in the ass sometimes. How being at Marvel is a dream of his, how he literally cried when they told him he had the job, how proud he felt when they wanted him to do his own comic. And Liam tells him that he deserves the best.

 _You’re the best_ Zayn thinks. _You’re the best thing working at Marvel’s brought me so far._

One cup of coffee turns into two cups of coffee and suddenly it’s almost dark outside and Zayn’s stomach makes a growling sound because his breakfast is far, far away and he is getting really hungry. But if he’s being honest, he doesn’t want to leave Liam’s flat. He just doesn’t want to leave Liam.

But of course, Liam hears it and he stops talking mid-sentence, grabbing a Zayn’s thigh and his brain just stop for a second because Liam is touching him.

“ _Oh my god_! I should have offered you some food. You must be starving!”

His eyes are so big like he feels so bad for it and like he is certain he is the worst host ever.  He is so cute that Zayn can’t help himself but laugh at him and poke his cheek in an attempt at making him smile. It works perfectly and Zayn can feel how warm Liam’s face is underneath the tip of his finger.

“Calm down Liam. I’m a bit hungry, yeah, but it’s fine. I’m gonna grab something on my way back home.”

He is about to get off of the couch and walk to the door but Liam’s fingers on his thigh just tighten and as he looks up at him, he sees Liam looking awfully shy, biting at his bottom lip.

“You could stay? Maybe? We could order something?” It is definitely turning into a date. It looks like a date. _Is it a date_?

“Yeah of course but I don’t want to… If you have other movie star stuff to do, it’s okay.”

“No,” his fingers are still on Zayn’s thigh and it’s so warm and he feels like they did move a tiny bit higher since Liam first put them there and their faces are also dangerously close now, “I want to. I have nothing else to do.”

Zayn can’t breathe and he needs to put a bit of distance between them because it can’t be happening right? He can’t be on Liam Payne’s couch, where he just spent the whole afternoon talking to him and now they are about to order take away. It looks like a date and if it’s not a date Zayn is probably going to die because he wants it to be a date _so bad_.

Liam looks like he is waiting for Zayn to do something, like he doesn’t want to push him too far and just be a gentleman and let Zayn do what he is comfortable with. And Zayn wants to, oh how he wants to kiss Liam but, it’s so much just now. He just can’t believe Liam maybe wants to kiss him so… He doesn’t move. He sees Liam’s face fall a tiny little bit in disappointment, and he removes his hand from Zayn’s thigh.

Liam stands up then and walks to the kitchen, asking Zayn what he wants to eat before picking a few take away menus from one of the cupboards. Now that Liam is in the kitchen, now that he is way too far away from him Zayn feels stupid. Of course he wants to kiss Liam and he should have done it just now. He wants him close, he wants to sit on his lap and kiss him until the morning. He could care less about ordering food but… He stomach growls again so he stand up to, meeting Liam in the kitchen.

He stands next to him and as Liam’s hands are resting on the counter, looking at the menus in front of him, Zayn leans closer to him. Their shoulders gently touching and Zayn’s fingers are reaching for Liam’s, just a soft brush of his fingertips against the side of Liam’s hand. He is looking at Liam, waiting for a reaction and he sees him looking at their hands and he turns it around, inviting Zayn to intertwine their fingers just as Paddy rushed into the kitchen, telling them he is leaving.

“You gonna be okay boys?

“Yes,” Liam says, pulling his hand away just a little bit and Paddy send him a wink and a quiet “Behave,” before closing the door behind him.

They decide to order a pizza in the end and as Liam put his phone back in his pocket, he asks Zayn if he wants to see the rest of the apartment.

The bathroom is huge, with a shower taking almost a whole wall and even a hot tub. There is another room where Liam must be working out because there is a treadmill and other gym stuff that Zayn don’t know a damn thing about. There is also a room that Liam curiously doesn’t show him and finally, there is Liam’s room. 

One of the kitchen walls was nothing but windows and it’s the same in Liam’s room. It’s decorated with long dark curtains but right now they are open, showing the bright lights of the city and it’s beautiful, really. Liam’s bed must be the size of a small country, all dark sheets and full of pillows. His closet seems huge too and there is a cute little cushion next to the bed where Loki must sleep.

Zayn walks towards the glass wall and even if he is not a fan of heights he can’t help but watch and just appreciate that amazing view Liam has from his bedroom.

He sees Liam walking towards him in the reflection of the windows and suddenly he is so close Zayn can feel the warmth of his body on his own. He feels Liam’s big hand rest softly on his waist and he takes another step closer because his chest is now pressed against Zayn’s back and he feels his breathe against his neck, making goosebumps raised all over his skin.

“Like what you see?”  Liam asks with a voice low and quiet that does nothing to stop the shiver going down Zayn’s spine. He is speechless, and all he does is nod his head, resting one of his hands on top of Liam’s. _Please don’t go_.

“Me too.”

As Zayn looks into the glass, his heart starts banging in his chest because in the reflection Liam isn’t looking at the city through the window like Zayn is, no. He is looking straight at _him_.

He feels Liam’s lips kissing softly at his neck while his hand goes slowly under his shirt, warm skin against his own. Zayn’s other hand goes up to rest against Liam’s neck, to keep him in place.

“I couldn’t believe it, the day of my audition. I couldn’t believe that you were even more beautiful in person, Zayn.”  Those words are barely a whisper against his throat but it seems so loud in the silent room.

“Liam…”

As for Zayn, he can’t believe this is happening. Can’t  believe he is in Liam’s arms with Liam’s lips kissing and sucking at his neck, telling him how beautiful he is. Can’t believe that his strong body is pressed against his own.

He wants to kiss Liam so bad. He wants those lips to leave his neck and crash into his own instead. Wants Liam to turn him and push him against those windows and kiss him so he can grind against him and feel if his cock is getting as hard as his own, almost painfully pushing against his zipper. It’s crazy what a few little kisses can do to you when it’s the right person giving them.

But sadly Zayn gets none of those things. What he gets is Liam going completely still against his back as a deep, loud voice come from what must be the front door.

“HONEY, I’M HOME!”

He feels Liam drop his head on his shoulder and mutters a quiet “ _Fuck_ ”

He does turn him around this time, his hands on Zayn’s waist and his face so, so so close to his and he does look quickly at Zayn’s lips before letting out a long, sad sigh,. “I’m so sorry Zayn. It must be Harry.”

And then he leaves Zayn alone against the window and it’s so cold suddenly without Liam’s body against his.

Harry? Harry as in the stylist Harry? As in maybe dating Liam stylist Harry?

When Zayn goes through the door of Liam’s bedroom, it’s to see Harry literally jumping into Liam’s arms, with his long legs around his waist and his also really long arms around his neck, smothering Liam’s face with small kisses. 

“Missed you so much Li-Li.”

“It’s only been three days, Harry. I thought you were supposed to come back tomorrow?” If Liam’s tone is slightly annoyed, his face is pure sunshine and oh…

 _What the fuck is happening_? He was about to get off against a damn window in Liam’s bedroom just minutes ago and now he is standing in his living room watching him holding his… _boyfriend_ in his arms? Harry drops to his feet when he spots Zayn standing next to them and he smiles brightly at him, dimples and everything and he holds one hand for Zayn to shake, keeping the other one around Liam’s waist.

“You must be Zayn! Nice to meet you finally, man. I’m Harry.” Finally? Did they want to push him into some kind of weird threesome thing? _What the fuck is happening_? He shakes Harry’s hand and just stand there, looking at them with a questioning look on his face while Liam explain to Harry that they order a Pizza and waiting for it.

And Zayn can’t stay here. _He just can’t_.

“Actually um… Louis texted me and he needs me so… I think I’m gonna go and leave you two alone.”

Liam’s face falls in a way that must be illegal in more than three countries. Zayn feels his stomach fall too, having put that look on Liam’s face but really, he can’t stay here with Liam and his… his _Harry_. Harry that is still holding onto Liam and smiling at him like he is a ball of pure sunshine. Like he is _his_ ball of pure sunshine and Zayn well, he feels pretty fucking cold suddenly.

“Really? But… Louis really needs you? I was looking forward to spend some time with you, Zayn.”

“Yeah… Sorry. I’ll leave you two to it. Seems like you need some time togheter.”

They both frown at him but before they can say anything else, Zayn puts his boots on and grabs his bag and he is out the door, with a wave and a rushed goodbye. As he surges through the doors of Liam’s building, Zayn feels tears of frustration in his eyes and how could he have been that stupid really? He finally sits in his car and tries to breathe and calm down. 

It’s nothing. They had talked like, twice? It shouldn’t hurt as much. But it does. Fuck does it hurt.

He pulls his phone and sends a quick text to Louis, asking him if he can stop by and he just drives in complete silence, radio off for what must be the first time in forever. But all the noises in his head is enough, he doesn’t need any music right now. He just needs the pain to go away.

 


	2. Never knew that it could mean so much

 Zayn walks into Louis’ place without even looking at him and goes straight to the balcony to light up another cigarette. He keeps telling himself how stupid he is. Keeps telling himself that of course Liam doesn't like him the way he does. Liam doesn't have a three year old crush on him like Zayn does. But why did he pushed him against that window and kiss his neck and tell him he was beautiful? Again.

That spot on his neck is still a tiny bit sensitive because of how Liam’s sucked on it for a while. He keeps poking at it, he can’t help it. He is cold and his fingers are a bit numb because of it. He’s having trouble just holding that damn cigarette to his mouth. Why does this affect him so much? It’s not like he was in a relationship with Liam for fuck’s sake!

But a tiny little voice in his head tells him that it’s like one his wildest dream just shattered on the floor and broke into thousand little pieces, bringing his heart with it. He can’t be in love already? Love at first sight only happens in movies, not in real life? He knows that back at Liam’s place he had thought about it, about being in love but it was in the heat of the moment. It was lust more than love… He can’t already be in love? Can he?

But maybe it’s love. Maybe it’s that easy to fall in love with Liam Payne. When it’s been years and years with that perfect image of someone in your head and they end up being even more perfect than you had imagine. When he knows now, how his lips feel on his skin, and how his hands are almost possessive on his waist… Yeah, maybe it’s that easy then, to fall in love.

It’s like Liam had set his heart on fire and then, ran away. Like he had let him all alone with that perfect but painful warmth spreading all over him, burning everything on it’s way. He can feel it right now, the hurt of those flames going through his body like it’s being pumped by the blood into his heart. His heart that even right now, had never beat so hard, so fast.

“Are you gonna tell me what happened or are you gonna give yourself lung cancer on my balcony?”

Louis can ruin someone’s life with only a few words. He can be pretty reckless when he wants to and if he hates you, run far, far away because he can ruin your whole existence in a heart beat. But the reason why Zayn loves him so much, it’s because that when he loves, when he cares, Louis can make you feel like the most important person on earth. He is ready to fight for you, no matter what the battle is. And now, his tone is soft and worried and he looks like all he wants to do is hold Zayn in his arms but is scared to be pushed away. Zayn has quite the temper himself but right now, he needs Louis so much. He needs to be held in his best friend’s arms no matter how pathetic it is.

“I’m so stupid...”

Louis holds a hand for Zayn and helps him get on his feet, “Come on, love. Let’s get inside you’re freezing.”

He leads Zayn to the couch and helps him remove his leather jacket before going to his bedroom and coming back to the living room with a thick, warm blanket. He sits next to him and with an arm around his shoulders he pulls Zayn closer to him so he can rest his head on the older boy’s chest. Then, he puts the blanket on both of them and just waits. He runs his fingers through Zayn’s dark hair and waits for him to talk. Even if the worry is clear on his face, he won’t push him into anything and Zayn loves him so much for that.

“He kissed me. Like… I went to his place because he wanted to talk about the comic since we hadn't yesterday. But we didn't today either. We just talked about ourselves and God… He is so perfect, Louis. I know I had a crush on the man for years now but… He is even better that everything I had imagined.”

“And why are you stupid? I saw the way he looked at you, babe. And you said he kissed you.”

Zayn bites at his bottom lips and nods his head. Feeling the ghost of Liam’s lips on his neck.

“He didn’t properly kiss me on the lips but… He did pushed me against a wall and sucked on my neck a little and told me how beautiful I was… And then his boyfriend showed up.”

“HIS WHAT?” Louis turns towards him so fast, his fingers leaving Zayn’s head to grip his shoulders but he can’t look into Louis’ eyes because he just feels so stupid. “Liam doesn’t have a boyfriend Zayn, COME ON! He looks at you like he wants to eat you whole.”

Zayn shakes his head, staring at his hands, “Well he has a Harry. A Harry who jumped in his arms and kissed him and told him how much he missed him.”

Louis frowns at him, “Did he tell you “Oh hey this is my boyfriend Harry?” “

“No… Not really but they both look so close and happy.”

“So are we! I’m sorry Zayn but our friendship is great and we cuddle all the time and we’re not a fucking couple! Liam thought we were, remember? What if that Harry is just his best friend?”

“It’s his stylist… I saw him on a gossip website once.” He is ashamed of even believing something he saw on some dumb website so, the last part, he kinda mumbles it and hopes that Louis doesn't hear him. "Rumors they are dating…”

“ _AND YOU BELIEVED SOME STUPID GOSSIP WEBSITE?_ ”

Louis grabs at Zayn’s shoulders tighter and pulls him against him again, his fingers back in his hair and Zayn put his arm around Louis’ torso because he just needs a good cuddle now. He needs silence and cuddles and to forget about Liam Payne and his maybe boyfriend/stylist.

“You are a little bit stupid Zayn. You will ask him if Harry is his boyfriend with words and clear sentences before starting to feel ashamed of yourself. Okay?”

“Okay…”

 

***

 

He doesn’t.

He doesn’t ask Liam the question. Even if Liam texts him later that night telling him he would have loved to spend his night with Zayn with way too many sad emojis. Or two days later when he texts Zayn again asking if they can hang out together the next day.

Zayn answers all of his texts, he can't just ignore Liam. Not yet. But he keeps saying no to him, he can’t see him, it’s too soon.  So he draws. It’s always been his way to deal with stuff so he draws all the fucking time. He does some pretty dark stuff to be honest but the comic he’s working on at the moment is dark and violent so it’s just the perfect way to exteriorise his sadness. But the text messages, they don’t stop and and it keep getting cuter and more adorable and Zayn just wants it to stop, but at the same time, having Liam’s attention is still all he wants.

_Liam:_

_On a plane and they’re playing The Avengers :)))) Do you ship Steve and Tony Zayn the world needs to know????_

_What’s Jonathan favorite meal? It’s important._

_Did you know that otters hold each other’s hand in the water when they sleep so they don’t drift away?!?!?_

_Do you think I can adopt an otter? Or two? so they can hold hands??_

_The girl at starbucks almost fainted giving me my coffee. Poor girl :(((_

_I want to hang out with you again. Bit sad about how busy you seem to be :(_

_Are you mad at me?? :((((_

The last one goes unanswered and Zayn starts to ignore him, just a little bit because he can’t deal with Liam being sad because of him when he is inconsolable himself. Louis keeps asking him if he has talked to Liam yet and every time Zayn shakes his head, and finally Louis yells at him.

“It’s like you want to be miserable. Like you almost enjoy it. TALK TO HIM ZAYN.”

But he doesn’t.

He tries to leave a few texts unanswered. Maybe Liam would understand and stop texting him but he doesn’t, he keeps texting and texting. And Zayn hates himself a little because he still waits for his phone to buzz with a new message, and he always keeps it close, and his heart is still doing that little Irish dance in his chest every time Liam’s name flashes on his screen... So yeah, maybe it’s a little bit of his own fault that he is feeling so miserable.

 

***

 

“ZAYN!”

Of course Liam is more than happy to see him. Of course he is walking towards him with the biggest smile on his perfectly handsome and squishy scruffy face. What Zayn didn’t expect though, was to be hugged by Liam the moment he walks through the door. To be engulfed in those wide arms and held against Liam’s chest like that’s where he belongs.

“I’m so happy to see you,” Liam whispers right into his ear. “Is it weird that I missed you?”

Why does he have to be so honest about everything? Why does it have to hurt so much? Why is it that all he can do when he is with Liam or thinking about Liam is ask himself questions he is too scared to ask out loud? He never wants to leave Liam’s arms but in the end he does, he takes a step back, eyes on his boots and he whispers a soft, “Missed you too, Leeyum.”

Louis and him had to be on set for the first day. The producer asked them to be and he also said they can come whenever they like. It’s their story and he wants to make it good, wants them to be proud of that movie in the end.

Zayn had been dragged on set by Louis, who insists that he needs to talk to Liam. But he can’t. Zayn is scared in a way he’s never been before. Because he doesn’t want the confirmation that Harry is indeed Liam’s boyfriend. He rather stay miserable and live in doubts and eventually get over him than know the truth, and he knows he is stupid, Louis keeps telling him how fucking stupid he is but he can’t _help_ it. Fear is one of the strongest feelings and when it holds your heart, when it’s grip is that strong around your throat, it’s hard to breathe, it’s hard to think properly. If it hurts so much living in doubts, Zayn is not ready for how much it can hurt to finally know the truth.

Liam’s name is called by one of the producers and he needs to go back on set because they are about to start filming. He squeezes softly at Zayn waist, his eyes full of questions and he hates that he makes him feel worried even when he is the one hurting right now and that's mostly because of him.

Louis hits him in the back of the head, probably because he missed the opportunity to talk to Liam again, as a blond and cheerful looking man walks towards them. He is about Louis’ height and his eyes are a shade of blue Zayn has never seen before. His cheeks are red and his smile is just contagious, like they are the big celebrities even though they are on a movie set full of those.

He goes for Zayn first. “You must be Zayn! I’m Niall, Liam’s agent. He talks about you loads, you know.” The look in his eyes is pretty obvious and he even gives Zayn a wink before turning towards Louis and shakes his hand as well.

Louis and Niall start to talk and it’s scary really, how fast and easy they seem to become friends almost instantly. Zayn has no other choice but watch Liam play as the two others talk and laugh together. At least it’s quite fascinating, learning how it works on a movie set, how they work with the green screen and how Liam seems at home in front of a camera. How he is just perfect in Jonathan’s character.

He watches for a few hours, talking a bit with Niall and Louis and he needs to say that Niall is great. He talks about Liam like a friend, not only like an agent and he seems to care a lot about him. He tells Louis that Liam and him wanted to go grab a beer at the end of the day and that it would be great if they wanted to join. Of course Louis says yes, and he almost jumps on Zayn’s foot when he wants to decline, so he says yes too.

They end up in a tiny little bar with barely anyone else there, but Niall and Liam love the place, especially because it’s almost always empty and nobody knows Liam. Louis had tried to push Zayn next to Liam in the booth but he ends up in front of him instead. He barely talks but he can’t help but smile and laugh at Liam and Niall’s banter. They look like really good friends. _Nothing like Harry and Liam_ , a little voice in Zayn’s head tells him.

All night, Liam leans closer to him to say random things. What kind of adorable thing Loki did, how he saw his sisters the other day and how happy they were about that role. He asks about Zayn’s sisters and he listens with a soft smile on his face. He talks a lot about the movie, how he loves to play Jonathan and how lucky he is to finally play that superhero role he always wanted to. He says it’s all because of Zayn, and he says thank you, squeezing his hands.

He basically does everything to make Zayn’s heart beat painfully in his chest and all he wants is to forget Harry and have Liam all for himself… But he can’t. It’s like the words are stuck in his throat, choking him.

He feels Liam’s foot softly resting against his ankle at some point and he jumps so hard he bangs his knee under the table. And again, Liam gives him a slightly confused look. It’s frustrating, even for himself, because he can’t find it in himself to just _ask_ Liam about Harry. He sees the look that Louis is aiming his way, but all he can think of is that night. When he was pressed against the window, Liam’s firm chest against his back, his plump lips on his neck… Before the sound of Harry’s voice stopped them.

And then, speaking of the devil, he hears Niall asking Liam about Harry, if he is at “home” and it’s just too fucking much for Zayn. He drinks the last of his beer in one long gulp and then gets up, telling Louis, a bit too loudly, that he is tired and he wants to go back home, that he really needs his bed. Niall ends up looking at him as confused as Liam is and Louis, with a sigh, stands up as well, saying goodbye to Liam, and then Niall, giving them both a hug and firm pat on the back.

When Liam gets to hug Zayn goodbye, he holds his shoulders and asks him if he is okay, “You’ve been a bit weird all day. I’m… I’m worried, Zayn, is it… Is it about what happened at my place last week?”

He looks so sad. It’s like Zayn is the one rejecting him and why is he like this? He is the one with a boyfriend why does he make Zayn feel bad about it? He can’t lie to him, but he can chose what he wants to actually say, “I’m just tired, Liam.”

He is. He barely slept since he left Liam’s appartment that night.

He takes a step back and Liam’s hands fall to his sides, without having the chance to give him a hug too, his eyes look at the ground and even then, Zayn can see the confusion and sadness on his face. They leave them behind, Liam and Niall, and Louis stays silent all the way back to Zayn’s place but as he finally puts his hand on the door handle to get out of his friend’s car, Louis locks the door.

“It’s your life Zayn. But if you don’t do something about this soon, I will. This is getting ridiculous and it’s killing me seeing you so sad.”

 

***

 

Louis goes on set a few more times but Zayn doesn’t. He stays at home or at his office to work on the next issue of The Pain, to do some coloring on other stuff and he needs to keep himself busy, when he works he doesn’t think about Liam or how much he misses him even if they had barely talked and barely touched.

Liam doesn’t text him anymore and he tries not to be too sad about it. That’s what he wanted after all.

It’s crazy, how you can feel heart broken for someone you barely know. How your heart seem to have a mind of it’s own and… It doesn’t care what you think, or how hard you’re trying to convince yourself that what you feel is ridiculous. It’s crazy how you can want deep down in your bones to stop being miserable but… Sometimes you just can’t. Sometimes emotions demand to be felt completely and you can’t ignore them. They take so much place, they take all the damn place and that’s all you know, that’s all you feel. And you have to embrace them even if you feel like your heart is being ripped out of your chest. Even if it hurts so much that you swear you will never love again.

One morning though, Louis opens the door of their office with the biggest smile on his face,like he knows something Zayn doesn’t and oh. It can’t be good. He looks so happy, humming under his breath and he holds two cups of coffee in his hands, giving one them to Zayn.

Louis sits behind his computer and starts working without even talking to him, so Zayn goes back to work himself. They spend the whole day that way, in almost silence, and it’s weird. With Louis, silence isn’t an option. But he looks really happy and pleased with himself and Zayn well, he is being miserable, as always. At the end of the day though, Louis talks to him, says that he needs to come with him on the set of the movie the next day, “They’re going to start filming the scenes with Liam in _The Pain_ ’s suit. They want us to be there to see it and to see if everything’s fine.”

Is Zayn ready to see Liam in a real superhero suit? Not really. Is he secretly dying to see it? _Fuck yeah_. He knows that he needs to go and he knows deep down inside that he wants to.

“Great. I’m gonna be there.”

Louis stops next to his desk then and leans towards him. He puts one hand on his shoulder and he gently squeezes it. Gentle Louis is back, the one who cares and his smile seems so real, that Zayn can’t help but believe him when he softly says, “Everything is going to be fine, Z. You’ll see.”

 

***

 

How is he supposed to be fine when Liam looks so good in the navy blue suit? How is he supposed to be fine when he doesn’t even smile at him, like he usually always does, when their eyes finally meet? He looks magnificent in that suit, like it was made just for him. It just fits him so good in all the right places and his shoulders look even wider and his abs even more defined through the dark spandex.

The suit is a dark blue from his shoulders to the tip of his toes. He has gloves going all the way up to his elbows, with thin silver lines decorating them. There is a big _P_ across his wide chest, in bright silver too, shinning under the spotlights. Those silver lines are all over the suit, down his strong thighs and up his sides tracing his muscles even through the fabric. Finally, just a tiny little mask, tied up behind his head, is covering his eyes, leaving his strong jaw and beautiful lips uncovered.

Zayn mouth suddenly feels dry because this is nothing like he had imagined, he is just better than what he drew, all those years ago and he never thought such a thing could be possible. But he looks sad. He must be looking fierce in that suit, he must be looking intimidating and strong. Unbeatable. But instead, he looks miserable, even more than Zayn, if such thing is possible.

“Well fuck me. That suit is perfect for him,” says Louis right next to him. “It’s like it’s been painted on his body.”

From the corner of his eyes, Zayn sees Niall talking with Harry. It’s the first time he has seen Harry on set and he is a bit surprised about not seeing him before. Maybe he was just waiting for Liam to wear the suit too, because it’s quite one of the best things he has ever seen, to be honest. Harry and Niall look pretty close, talking in each other’s ears, one of Harry’s enormous hands in the small of Niall’s back, holding him close. They look closer than he was with Liam that night and… Maybe it’s only how Harry is? Overly friendly with everyone he meets? He stops looking at them though, as he hear Liam’s voice speaking soflty to him.

“Hi.”

“Hey Liam. Nice suit.”

“I feel naked. It’s so light I feel like I'm wearing absolutely nothing.”

Zayn can feel his face burning at those words and he sees that Liam’s face is also red with embarrassment. “Sorry it’s just… Tight?”

“You look great. More than great really. You look just like the character. You.. You’re perfect, Liam.”

Okay wow. What was that? Come on Zayn, fall on your knees and just tell him you’re in love with him, it’s gonna be less embarrassing. But at those words, Liam finally smiles at him, for the first time that day and the first time in what seems like forever. It’s not his full on shining brighter than the sun smile, no, but it’s something. Zayn smiles back because he can’t help it and Liam goes back on set, ready to start filming.

Zayn can’t really look at him for so long before feeling his dick showing some interest in his pants. It’s just… His crush, no, the man he is pretty sure he is in love with, and even through the heartbreak, he still does, is wearing a superhero suit and for the nerdy geeky boy that Zayn always has been well, it’s a lot. He needs a cigarette and he needs it now before popping a boner right in the middle of a movie set, surrounded by people he barely knows.

As he makes his way outside, he hears some muffled noises coming from a dark corridor on his left and when he turns his head to see what his happening, he almost drops his pack of cigarettes on the floor.

Harry has pushed Niall against a door and they are doing what Zayn can only describe as eating each other's face. They are making out almost violently and Zayn can hear their moans and whimpers and they are pretty much dry humping in that corridor.

They never acknowledge Zayn’s presence, too busy kissing each other so he walks pass them and goes outside to finally smoke his well-deserved cigarette. He smokes two, just to get over the shock of what he just saw. Liam’s boyfriend furiously making out with his agent. Is he supposed to tell it to Liam? He can’t find it in himself to break his heart even if he pretty much broke Zayn’s not so long ago. If he is pretty much breaking what’s left of Zayn’s heart everytime they see each other or just talk. What is he going to do about it?

He doesn't know how long he stays outside but it must be a while because he had smoked a lot more than two cigarettes in the end when Louis finally finds him.

“There you are! Liam is taking a break from filming, you must come inside. There is something you might want to see.”

He doesn’t wait for Zayn to answer, he just grabs his arm and drags him inside. Zayn throws the rest of his cigarette away and let himself be pulled inside, still trying to think of a way to tell Liam about what he witnessed earlier. He doesn’t have to think about it longer though, because the three of them, Liam, Harry and Niall are sitting together and Niall is sitting on Harry’s lap. _In front of Liam_.

What kind of fucked up relationship do those three have? He knows he could have asked a different way, a more… gentle way? But he is just tired, he is tired because he barely sleeps and he is heart broken and all those questions going through his head are making him dizzy so he just speaks without even thinking, “What the fuck is happening?”

Liam looks confused, as always. It’s like the only expression he has when he is next to Zayn lately and a tiny little hopeful part of Zayn starts to understand why. Harry looks as confused as Liam but Niall, Niall is _smiling_ and so is Louis like they both know exactly what is happening.

Niall speaks first, and the words coming from his mouth are the best Zayn have heard in weeks, “Well Zayn, I know you have already met Harry but I would like to introduce him to you another time. As my _boyfriend_.”

“Harry is not your boyfriend. Harry is Liam’s boyfriend!”

As Harry is saying “ _Excuse me?_ ” because yeah Zayn had just been a bit rude, oops. Liam is screaming, “Harry is not my boyfriend!”

Louis is laughing next to him and Niall is trying really hard no to. But Liam... Liam is suddenly smiling so big “Oh,” all traces of confusion are gone from his pretty face and Zayn never felt more stupid in his whole life. Harry is _Niall’s_ boyfriend. Liam and Harry are just friends. Liam carefully walks towards him until he is standing right in font of Zayn and takes one his hand, intertwining theirs fingers.

“Harry lives with me. He is my stylist and also my best friend, has been for years now. Not my boyfriend. Is this why you ran away the night he came back? And why you have been acting so weird lately? Why you were ignoring me?”

“I thought he was your boyfriend,” mumbles Zayn, looking at their feet instead of Liam’s face because he isn’t ready yet to look at him while feeling like such a fool. “He jumped into your arms and kissed you and called you honey and... God. I’m so stupid.”

“BOYS! What about we leave those two alone,” says Louis and suddenly, the three other boys are gone God knows where, leaving Zayn and Liam standing alone. Liam is still in _The Pain’s_ suit and Zayn is secretly wishing the ground will just open up to swallow him and end his embarrassment.

Liam’s other hand lift up to his chin and Zayn is suddenly looking into those brown eyes, those eyes that are crinkling at the sides because he is smiling at him like he is so, so happy about the turn of events. One of his fingers softly traces the line of Zayn’s jaw and looks at him like this moment is important and he wants to remember it forever.

“I think there is a few things I need to clear up since you never asked any questions." He doesn’t sound mad or angry at Zayn no, he sounds incredibly fond like Zayn is the most adorable human being he has ever seen.

“I am a fan of your work since forever Zayn. Well, I’m a comic book fan since forever but I remember the first stuff you did at Marvel’s and I was like, wow. That man is really talented. And then, _The Pain_ came out and I was like _Oh My God_! This is the best comic I’ve ever read. So I googled your name,” and that finger is now tracing his cheekbones and the curve of his eyebrows.

“I couldn’t believe how beautiful you were and I remember saying to Harry that you were the one with the face of a movie star. And at my audition, we were here, absolutely stunning and I still don’t know how I managed to have the role with how nervous I was. Niall told me to go to Marvel’s and talk to you a bit more and… _Fuck_ , Zayn you’re perfect. We have hung out together two times and I already can’t get enough of you. I knew everything about the character. I read those comics hundreds of times, I just wanted to spend some time with you, to get to know you better.”

He lowers his voice and speaks right into Zayn’s ear then, “I would have fucked you against that window if Harry hadn't showed up that night.”

Zayn lets his head drop on Liam’s shoulder and lets go of his hand to wrap both of his arms around Liam’s waist. He whispers his next confession too. “I had the biggest crush on you for years. I drew a fucking comic book inspired by you because I was completely obsessed with your face.”

He feels Liam’s laugh then and he pulls away just a little to look at Zayn, lifting his chin again for their eyes to meet and Zayn loves this, those soft fingers against his chin, “You’re not freaking out?” asks Zayn, brows scrunching in confusion, seeing Liam’s happy face.

Liam shakes his head, “No. You made one of my dreams came true, Zayn. You helped me be a superhero. How can I freak out about that? Those last weeks without you were the worst by the way. I don’t know how you did it so fast but you got under my skin in a way nobody ever did before, Malik. Now if you’re done being all jealous and insecure over my _best friend_ , I would really like it if I can kiss you.”

“Why do you have to be so adorable and say such cute things to me?” Zayn groans before quickly closing the distance between Liam and him and finally, finally kissing those pretty lips.

It’s like every single ones of Zayn’s fantasy are mixing together and it’s the best really. He gets to kiss Liam Payne, the man he had the biggest crush on for years, and then there is just Liam, the ordinary boy that in the end is better than he could've dreamed of, the boy he fell in love with. On top of all those amazing things, he is dressed in a tight super hero suit and Zayn’s geek senses are tingling with how hot it is. But the most important is how good that kiss is, how delicious he tastes and how soft his lips are when his hold on his waist is strong and solid. He feels safe and loved and it’s perfect.

“I don’t know. I guess that’s what makes me so charming,” says Liam against his lips, leaving soft smiling pecks against his mouth without walking away, still holding him close.

“I’m sorry. I should have talk instead of run away.”

Liam just hums against his lips before kissing him another time, oblivious of the people surrounding them and of the fact that they were still on the movie set and that Liam should probably go back to work soon. Zayn is totally fine with it though, he had waited for so long to kiss those lips, dreamed about it even. But the real thing is better, the best kisses he ever had.

With his fingers slowly tracing Zayn’s face, his other arm still around his waist, Liam tells him that Niall was pretty much in love with Harry for years now, Harry being just as infatuated with the blond man but they were both oblivious about it. Liam had tried to make them fall into each other arms so many times he had lost count and earlier this week it finally worked. With Louis’s help, thank’s to him, things are finally clear between them. They had talked, and yelled at each other and kissed and done other stuff Liam would really love to forget and he deeply regrets having them talk and sort out their feelings at his and Harry’s place when Niall lives alone.

“I would have thought super rich movie stars would be able to afford a place of their own without having roomates,” Zayn tries to joke but Liam looks at the ground at those words.

“He’s my best friend. And… It feels a bit lonely sometimes being a super rich movie star…”

“Hey,” and Zayn forces him to look up for their eyes to meet and he is sad because, they put some kind of make up all over his pretty face and neck and he can’t see his lovely birthmark because of it, “I would love to help you feel less lonely.”

“Are you done being jealous of Harry,” but there is a smile in his voice at those words and a cute blush starts to spread on his round cheeks before the next words fall from his lips, “because I would love it if you two can get along?” Zayn cheeks hurt with the force of the smile lightening up his face, “Stop making fun of me, those last few days were shit Zayn, I like you, a lot, and I --”

The rest of that sentence is swallowed by Zayn’s eager lips as he couldn’t help but kiss Liam again. How can he stop doing that now that he knows what those lips tastes like, when he is already addicted to the way they feel against his own. Perfect, he thinks, his smile pushed against those puffy red lips, mostly swollen because of how Zayn can’t stop licking and biting at them.

Yup. _Perfect_.

 

***

 

Liam had to eventually get back on set but he made Zayn promise to come to his place at the end of the day. “You kind of ruined my date last time, so you better be there.”

So, here he was, in that elevator with Paddy again, and Paddy couldn’t stop smiling like he knew what Zayn and Liam were about to do and if he wasn’t almost twice Zayn’s size he would’ve tried to hit him. But he was too happy to hit anyone and he kind of likes Paddy. He is nice with Liam, like a big brother taking care of him, but a bit scarier.

He left Zayn all alone in front of Liam’s door though, walking back to the elevator saying that he was asked to escort Zayn to his door and then go home. He wished him good night and he gave him a wink that was enough to put a heavy blush on Zayn’s cheeks. He knocks on the door then, trying to make his hands stop shaking and to breathe normally.

The door swings open so fast Zayn is afraid Liam ripped it off the wall but his hands grab at Zayn’s wrist and he is being pulled inside and pushed against the door. Without even saying hi, Liam is on him, crowding him against the door and he turns the lock and the sound is so loud in the empty flat, Zayn can feel it into his bones, like some kind of confirmation of what is going to happen.

Liam’s hands find their way to his waist, and under his shirt, one on his stomach and around his hip, against that big blocky black heart, like he knows even if he never saw Zayn’s shirtless that its here just under his fingertips. He puts his other hand in the small of his back, their foreheads are resting against each other and Zayn can feel more than he can see Liam’s smile a few inches from his own lips. He knows that he is smiling too and his own hands are laying flat against Liam’s chest, getting drunk on the feeling of his heart beating almost too fast. But his own is beating just as fast, like they are trying to be in sync, but they don’t need to try that hard, they already are.

“Hi Liam,” but Liam’s answers isn’t said with words no, it’s said with his mouth crashing into Zayn’s and his fist balling into his shirt to pull him closer and Zayn finally wrap his arms around Liam’s neck.

He feels Liam’s hands running up and down his sides as they kiss and he finally set them on his ass, making him roll his hips against him once before lifting him up in his arms and holding him against the door, hands under his thighs. Zayn easily puts his legs around Liam’s waist as the latter holds him up against the front door and kisses him like he doesn’t need to breathe anymore, like Zayn is all he needs as long as their lips are touching each other’s.

But Zayn does need air at some point and he pulls away from Liam only to have the other man leaving biting kisses over his jaw and down his throat. “Fuck. Liam.” It feels so good, being held against that door, being owned by every part of Liam’s body, his lips against his throat and his hands holding so tight to his legs he feels like there is going to be bruises there tomorrow morning. He wants it. He wants bruises all over him, and love bites too. He wants to belong to Liam and he want it to be written all over him, like some kind of tattoos made with just the tips of his fingers and his tongue.

He does feel Liam’s hands starting to slip and his arms are trembling but he keeps kissing Zayn’s like nothing is more important than the taste of his lips. “Liam,” and he stops for a bit, looking at Zayn and he is out of breath, looking so, so pretty like that, all flustered with his hair a complete mess from Zayn’s fingers, “Take me to bed. Please.”

Liam leaves another biting kiss against Zayn’s lips before taking a step back and putting his feet back on the ground. He stays that way only for a few seconds though, because Liam grabs Zayn around his waits and hoist him up on his shoulder, taking him to his bedroom like some kind of fireman, some kind of _superhero_. Zayn is banging his fists on his back and yelling to him, “ _LIAM!_ What the fuck are you doing put me down!”

“You wanted to be taken to bed, that’s what i’m doing.”

He starts to laugh then, Zayn can feel it from where he is and he sounds so happy and he gives Zayn’s ass a little slap that makes him squeek, a sound that is everything but manly. He can’t help it and he starts laughing too because he is so fucking happy, because this is Liam and how can he fight him when the sound of him giggling is like music to his ears.

Liam pushes at his bedroom door and walks to his bed before dropping Zayn there softly, like he is precious and something worth all of his attention. He does look at him the same way, pushing some strands of hair that had escaped Zayn’s pony tail when they were kissing back there against the front door.

“I know I kind of… Jumped on you when you arrived but… We don’t have to. We can just kiss and sleep okay? Whatever you want, Zayn.”

Who is this boy? In the last 10 minutes he gave Zayn some kind of raging boner, made him laugh like he was 12 years old again by carrying him in his arms and now… Now he is feeling like all of his organs are slowly melting inside of him, just with the warmth into Liam’s eyes and the softness of his words. And the way he is touching him like he is some treasure, buried into the sheets of his bed, is overwhelming in the best of ways. He wants to get surprises by every little aspects of Liam’s personality everyday. He wants to learn, pieces by pieces what makes Liam Payne so exceptional.

“I’m not proud of it but, I’ve been dreaming of you fucking me for _years_ Liam. So if you want it just as much as I do, please shut up and put that dick into me. Like, now.”

Liam’s cheeks turns pick at those words (again) but he laughs, hiding his face in Zayn’s neck, “Well I’ll put my fingers first if it’s okay, I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Aaaaw. Always taking care of me _Leeyum_.”

He turns incredibly serious at those words. He gets up a little, resting on his forearms on each sides of Zayn’s head, “I want to. I want to take care of you, make you feel good. I want to make you happy Zayn.”

“But you are,” Zayn says, tracing Liam’s bottom lip with the pad of his thumb, “I am happy.” He closes the distance between them and kisses him again. Softly this time, without the urgency from before.

They pull away to share a smile and then Zayn is rolling on top of Liam’s because enough of those cheesy confessions full of feelings. His dick is hard and in needs of some attention and he’s in bed with Liam Payne so he’s gonna take advantage of it.

He pushes his hands under Liam’s shirt, feeling that thin layer of hair and the hardness of those muscles and he scratches his nails just a tiny little bit over Liam’s nipples and smiles as he sees and feels him arching his back and closing his eyes just a few seconds. He pulls at the hem of his shirt then and took it off, Liam helping him and then quickly tugging at Zayn’s own t-shirt to undress him too.

He stays up then, sitting with Zayn on his lap and he looks at every little pieces of ink covering his chest, tracing some of them with his fingers, and others with his tongue, kissing the lips in the center of his chest before laying back on the pillows. He is looking at Zayn from under his lashes and then, without a warning he rolls his hips up and Zayn feels his dick, so hard, rubbing against his ass and he is falling forward, hands on Liam’s chest as the other boy slides his hands under the waistband of Zayn’s sweatpants, pulling him even closer.

“Off, please Zayn take those off,” he is still in his jeans himself and it can’t be comfortable with how hard he is. Zayn stand up then, even if a part of him just wants to sit on Liam’s lap forever. He pulls off his sweatpants and his boxers without looking at Liam and throw them somewhere in the room. Before he starts feeling self conscious about his skinny legs or his abs not as defined as Liam’s he sits back on his lap to find him completely naked too.

They both suck in a sharp breath as their dicks rub against each other, both of them so hard and already a little bit wet with precum. They kiss again for a few beats, grinding against each other just enough for the friction between them to feel amazing. Because Zayn knows that if they go at it a little bit harder, a little bit quicker, he could come like this, rubbing against Liam, sucking on his tongue and leaving marks all over his back with his nails.

He feels a dry finger between his cheeks and he stops kissing Liam, his forehead falling on his shoulder and he can’t keep the moan that escapes his lips at this moment or the stuttering of his hips as Liam slowly but surely circles his tight hole, “Want me to get you ready for my cock?”

“F-fuck. Yes. _Please_.”

“Get on your hands and knees for me baby, okay?”

Zayn does it more than willingly, getting on all fours on Liam’s huge bed. He ends up facing the windows and he remembers the other day with Liam all over his back and his lips on his neck telling him how beautiful he is. Liam’s hands are on his hips now, rubbing softly up his sides and he feels his chest covering his back, his hard leaking cock grinding slowly against his ass.

“Next time,” Liam says, right in his ear, his voice thick with arousal, “I’m gonna fuck you against the window. We can even do it on the balcony if you want. We’re so high no one would know.”

Zayn lets his head hang between his shoulders then, pushing roughly against Liam’s cock and letting a desperate whine pass his lips. If Liam keeps teasing him with his words, and his hands and his cock, deliciously hard against the sensitive skin of his hole, he’s going to take care of himself without anyone’s help.

Liam removes himself from Zayn’s body and he whines again, louder this time, at the lost of Liam’s skin against his own before he hears Liam opening a drawer behind him and he comes back as quickly as he left. He kisses down Zayn’s back, sucking a little bit longer at the bird just at the top of his spine. He feels wet fingers rubbing at his entrance then, a little bit teasing, a little bit careful.

“If it hurts you tell me, right? I don’t want to hurt you, babe.”

Why does he have to be so sweet when his hands feels rough and possessive all over his skin, when his words send sparks down Zayn’s spine and the only feel of his mouth against his burning skin is enough to leave Zayn so hard it hurts? And he is taking care or him, whispering how much he cares and how he wants it to be good for him.

Zayn is going crazy with it all, his brain has melted in his skull and all the blood of his body has gone south, leaving him unable to speak. All he can do his feel. Feel every part of Liam on him, but also in him, even if his fingers are still softly kneeding his ass and his waist, it’s like he is already in him, in his veins, in his blood, in his heart.

He feels a fingers pushing into him, taking his mind away from all the love he feels for Liam and back to what his body wants. He is glad for Liam’s body all over him, for the fact that even if he can’t see him, he’s here, and he is close and he feels safe like that. He is slowly opening him, with a single finger first, and a second one and that’s when Zayn found his voice back for a few moments, to beg him for more.

When Liam is three fingers deep, curling them once a few thrusts to make bright colors burst behind Zayn’s eyelids and his body feels like he is on fire, Zayn manages to hold himself with just one hand and fist at Liam’s short hair, telling him he is ready, “I need your cock Liam. Please.”

“Can I see you? Wanna get on your back babe so I can see you?”

As soon as Liam’s fingers leave his ass, Zayn rolls on his back and Liam is… He is something right from a dream, all sweaty with sex hair and his red cheeks, his lips ruined from kisses and from the way his teeth were probably biting them as he was fingering him.

Liam grabs a condom next to them on the bed, and tries to open it with slippery fingers. Zayn sits up and helps him, loving the way Liam’s stomach tightens as he rolls the piece of rubber onto his hard cock. He quietly asks for a kiss and he keeps stroking Liam’s softly as their lips find each other easily. He thinks he will never get tired of kissing Liam. Right now he really wants him to fuck him senseless but his kisses... His kisses means everything. He is already addicted to the taste of his tongue and the feel of his lips against his own.

He feels Liam’s hands against his shoulders and he is being pushed back against the bed,still kissing and then he feels those hands on the inside of his thighs. He feels the head of Liam’s cock rubbing against him. He pulls back from the kiss, standing up on his knees between Zayn’s legs, “Lift your hips up, babe,” he says in the silent room, his whisper sounding so loud around them. When Zayn’s hips are higher, comfortably resting on one of Liam’s pillow, he guide himself back towards Zayn’s entrance and slowly, so slowly he pushes himself inside of him.

Zayn lets his head falls onto the bed, unable to look at Liam. He needs to close his eyes and breathe, getting a bit overwhelmed by the stretch of Liam entering him. He stops, once he is fully inside and leans on top of Zayn, their chests almost pressed against each other and Liam’s leaves soft kisses all over his face, whispering how beautiful he is, and how good he is taking him.

His eyes still closed, Zayn tries to speak, “Do you mean it?” and he slowly opens them to see Liam looking at him with a confused expression on his face. “You keep telling me i’m beautiful…”

He smiles at him then, more of a smirk than his usual bright and genuine smile, and he starts to move slowly. Long, dragging thrusts of his hips inside of Zayn, and he speaks against his kiss-swollen lips, “You are the most beautiful man I have ever seen.”

Zayn can’t keep the smile off his face at those words, or the way his hands are now grabbing at Liam’s shoulders to keep him close. It’s so cheesy but it feels so good to hear it. Liam stops for a few beats and he says something else, “I’m going to do anything to prove you how much I mean it.”

His thrusts turns harder then, and he fucks into Zayn with purpose, grabbing his thighs and the bed starts moving underneath them. Liam hides his face into Zayn’s neck and he leaves bites and kisses and sweet praises of how good he feels and how tight he is around his dick. And Zayn, he takes it all, all the pleasure and the arousal, and the feel of his leaking cock rubbing against Liam’s hard stomach and the love, oh the love he feels in that moment is more intense than anything else.

“Liam,” he can’t help but moan his name, like he is begging him for something but  he is already doing absolutely everything he wants. “Liam. Liam. Liam,” He needs more though, he needs something or someone to touch his dick but at the same time he wants to keep Liam close to him, never wants him to leave. Maybe the friction of his stomach could be enough, maybe he can come just by rubbing against those abs.

It’s like Liam senses it, feels that he needs more and his thrusts gets just a little slower and he lifts his face from where it was pushed against Zayn’s shoulders and he looks into his eyes, leaving one lingering kiss on his mouth, still fucking into him, “You want to ride me?”

“Will you let me come all over your chest if I do?”

Liam loses his rhythm then, his hips stuttering as he almost growls at Zayn words, “ _Fuck_.”

“I take that as a yes,” Zayn says with a smirk as Liam rolls over on his back, bringing Zayn with him. As Zayn lowers himself back on Liam’s cock, inches by inches, he feels Liam’s hands against his thighs, his grip hard and solid as he tries to keep his hips on the bed, as he waits for Zayn to be ready before moving again.

But he is not the one moving first no, Zayn is quick to put his hands on Liam’s wide chest and he is rolling his hips, the angle just perfect for Liam to hit that spot inside of him. He fucks himself on Liam’s cock a few times, his head hanging low between his shoulders and he can’t keep the noises inside of him, it feels so good, it feels so fucking right and he knows what he says probably doesn’t make any sense but he needs to be loud because this is _perfect_.

He feels Liam’s arm going around his waist, pulling him closer and his other hand is being wrapped around his hard leaking cock. And Zayn, Zayn just rides Liam like it’s what he was born to do, rolling his hips and jumping on it, his shaking arms still on Liam’s chest, holding him up.

Liam is always there to hold him tight and to fuck into him, meeting Zayn’s thrusts with his own, trying to match the rhythm of his hand with the one of their hips. He keeps saying soft words of encouragement and Zayn is close, so close he feels it low in his stomach.  Liam’s arm leaves his waist to fist at Zayn’s hair and to bring their lips together and he keeps jerking him off while Zayn’s just fucks himself on Liam.

And that, the pain of his hair being pulled, the possessiveness in that little gesture sends sparks all the way down his spine and he comes, all over Liam’s stomach and chest, his mouth leaving Liam’s to hide his face against his neck instead and muffle his whimpers against the sweaty skin on his throat.

He slowly but surely comes down from his incredible high to feel Liam’s nails scratching his skull almost tenderly and his other hand is tracing soft, comforting circles into the sweaty skin of his lower back, his throbbing cock still deep into Zayn’s ass.

Still a bit shaky, he tries to pull himself up, to rest on his hands on each side of Liam’s head and the other man is smiling to him, like he is the luckiest man in the world. N _o silly, that’s probably me_. “Come on, Li. Fuck me like you mean it. It’s your turn to get one mind blowing orgasm.” He gives Liam a lazy smile and a lazier kiss, pushing his tongue past his lips and letting it dance against Liam’s.

He feels his hands first, gripping his hips almost painfully and it doesn’t take long for Liam to start thrusting into Zayn again, he does it hard but Zayn doesn’t care, he wants to see that pure bliss on Liam’s face, he wants to see it and he needs to know he is the reason for it. “Am I hurting you?” and even seconds away from an orgasm, Liam takes some time to take care of him, to ask if he is okay.

“No you’re not, babe. Come on, I want you to come for me, Liam. Please. Show me how much you like this.”

The truth is that yeah, it hurts a little and he is getting a bit too sensitive but it’s not long before he feels Liam going completely still beneath him, before he sees him throwing his head back against the pillows, and he comes with Zayn’s name on his lips and a delicious bruising grip on his hips.

As Liam is probably trying to remember his name, Zayn keeps himself busy by leaving kissing are over his shoulders and neck, feeling sleepy and incredibly good. It was amazing. Better that what he had dreamed of for all those years. He never thought that Liam would be so sweet, so caring and so full of love.

In his dreams, it was always some rough, passionate sex and some quickies in his office or on Liam’s movie set. Maybe there is going to be some of those, damn Zayn wants all of this but, he couldn’t have dreamed of a better first time with Liam Payne.

Hands make their way from his waist to his shoulders, a sign that Liam is slowly coming back to life and Zayn lifts his head to meet those warm brown eyes,  “I think you killed me,” Liam says with a tiny smile on his lips.

“And I think we should get cleaned up in your shower bigger than my own bedroom.”

Zayn rolls to his side slowly, wincing as Liam slips out from him and he watches him stand up on shaky legs to throw the condom into the little bin next to his bed. He walks to Zayn’s side of the bed and holds a hand for him, pulling him up to his feet. He keeps him close though, with his hands on Zayn’s waist but he’s avoiding his eyes, looking shy, looking almost uncomfortable, “Was that um... You know. Was that okay? It’s been a while and um…”

“Liam? You’re fucking with me right?”

“Just did, actually,” and he is so proud of that joke, fighting a smile, “I just… I wanted it to be good. I don’t want you to walk away like you did last time and I thought --”

“Liam. I’m already thinking of what I want to do to you for round two, and three, and even round four. It was amazing. You are amazing. I was stupid before, I won’t walk away again. Every little aspects of who you are is driving me crazy. Maybe I was dumb to think that Harry was your boyfriend, but you are a little bit dumb too for not seeing how much I like you, how much I want you. Now, if you’re done, I would like to take a shower and then cuddle with my boyfriend.”

“Boyfriend?” And Liam smile was back, the brighest one that could probably light up the whole city of London at night.

“Yes, _boyfriend_! No more awkward talking after mind blowing orgasms okay?”

“Okay.”

This time it was Zayn’s turn to take Liam in his arm and across his shoulder to carry him to the bathroom. Delighted by Liam’s melodious laugh hitting the bathroom walls and Zayn’s heart at the same time.

They end up slowly washing each other, Liam enjoying more than anything rubbing shampoo into Zayn’s long dark hair and the way he is going soft and pliant in his arms as he is doing it. They share soft kisses and lazy touches and words full of love and it’s perfect.

After cleaning themselves they end up in Liam’s huge bed, with clean sheets that Liam put by himself while Zayn sneaks into his walk-in to borrow a shirt and some boxers to sleep in, a shirt that smells just like Liam that he is already planning on stealing tomorrow morning. The look on Liam’s face when he comes back to the room wearing his clothes is more than worth it and tells him that it’s probably okay to steal as much of Liam’s clothes as he wants.

Once they are both tangled into each other under the sheets, into Liam’s big comfy bed. Once they are both laying in silence in the dark, Zayn is thinking about apologizing to Harry, and saying thank you to Louis, and asking Niall to properly introduce Harry to him because, Niall is great and if he loves Harry than Harry must be great too. Hell, if he is Liam’s best friend he must be amazing!

“You’re thinking too much, _boyfriend_ , I can almost hear your brain working from here.”

Zayn can’t help but smile at the way Liam speaks the word boyfriend, like it’s the best thing ever, like it’s his new favorite word,  “I just… I want to meet Harry. Properly. Since he is important for you I… I want to meet him and apologize.”

“Of course. Now go to sleep yeah? I want you in shape for round two.”

Zayn let himself fall asleep into Liam’s arms, surrounded by his smell and his warmth and he is gone in seconds. It’s easy to let himself go when he never felt more safe. When everything is good and everything is clear in his head. When he feels like he just have been saved by the hero at the end, like the vilain is dead and the city is safe and everything is good. _Finally_.

 

 

 

**Epilogue**

 

Zayn’s hands are sweating and he keeps trying to dry them on his fancy dress pants. He also keeps looking at Liam who look absolutely stunning. Harry did a great job on his outfit tonight, Zayn can’t wait to come back home to remove it from him.

He is wearing a white shirt with a black vest on top and a beautiful dark grey coat.

Liam turns to Zayn with a big smile on his face, and he looks so calm when Zayn is about to shit himself with how nervous he is. He grabs one of his hands and place a quick little kiss against Zayn’s nuckles, “It’s going to be fine, babe. Don’t freak out.”

But Zayn is freaking out. Zayn is the first person Liam ever bring to any premiere he did. Zayn is a man and even though Liam had always claimed he was bisexual, the only man he was ever seen in public with was Harry and he knows by then that Harry is not and never been Liam’s boyfriend. He is Liam’s boyfriend and they are about to tell the world what they are and Zayn had never been so nervous before.

He is nervous because the crowd is huge and he’s never been comfortable in that kind of big public events or just in public generally speaking. So, yeah,  Zayn is nervous but he is also scared. Scared about all the stuff that people will tell about Liam seing him with another man, he is scared that he won’t have all the roles he really wants now that he is publicly in a same gender relationship.

“What if… What if your career goes down because of us being here together tonight, Li?”

“We’ve talked about this before Zayn,” says Liam with a sigh. “We’ve been papped together a lot already and Niall is okay with it. Everybody is okay with it. I want to. I want to show you to the whole world, babe. That’s how much I love you.”

It’s been months that Zayn is hearing these words, months that he is also saying them back to Liam but the butterflies never stop fluttering into his stomach every time he hears them, “I just don’t want you to have shit roles now because of us. Of me.”

“You gave me the best role ever, baby. You made my dream of being a superhero came true and even if it’s the last role I’ll ever play, you gave me that. And I have you by my side and that’s the only thing that matters to me okay?”

“Okay”

And he believes those words. It is okay because they have each other. Because he found a superhero to save his own little world and he fell in love with that hero, like he never thought he could love someone before. It still feels like Liam had set his heart on fire and it’s still burning after months and it’s not gonna die soon, Zayn is pretty sure of that.

As the limo stops in front of the theater, Zayn feel Liam’s hand grab his own and as the door open and the flashes of the cameras start blinding them, he knows he is ready, and if not well, he could always be saved by the man holding his hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you SO, SO, SOOOOO much for all the great comments I have on that story, really, I was nervous and scared and you guys wrote me lovely messages on the story but also on tumblr and I still can't believe the number of kudos and comments I had only on chapter one so I hope chapter two will be/was good too and that you're not disapointed by my ending. Big thank you's and a lot of love and kissed to everyone.
> 
> I'm on tumblr tanktopliam.tumblr.com :))


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